I know this is going to be a long post, but please, try and bear with me and read it all the way through.. especially if you're going to leave a comment. What I'm about to say is probably going to make a lot of people mad.. I'm sure I'll be getting hate mail the rest of the week from my more liberal friends who have pretty much decided I am a crazy person when it comes to politics. But in all honesty, I don't care. It's taken me a long time to get to the point of not caring.. to simply voice what God has put on my heart and not worry about whether or not I've made someone unhappy. The road to realizing that I cannot please everyone in my life AND still please God 100% of the time has been a long one. But the bottom line is, for me, God trumps everyone else. So again, feel free to disagree.. I no longer care about displeasing people whose viewpoints are not biblical.
But I digress. It is officially election day. At this time four years ago, I marched my 20 year old butt into the voting booth feeling informed and confident. My dad and Debbie had sat down with me the night before and together we went over all of the propositions and people running against each other and what everything meant so I wouldn't walk in uninformed. I hope to do that with my own kids someday.. not tell them who to vote for or try and push my personal beliefs onto them, but rather to help them fully understand the process. I stand firmly in my belief that our right to vote should NOT be taken for granted; it is in your best interest to not EVER say to me, even jokingly, "but everyone knows our individual votes don't really count." I may sock you in the face, and I'd rather not break my hand over such an ignorant comment. So there I was.. 20, newly engaged but still living with my dad, and going to school to be an esthetician and massage technician. At the time, I felt I understood the world pretty well.. I now realize how naive I really was. I've always been mature for my age, or so people say, so while in comparison to most 20 year olds I was indeed ahead of the game, I still had a lot to learn. I voted for Bush, hands down, with zero reservations. While being at war was hard on my heart because of how pro-life I am, I happily went along without a political title and found myself agreeing with the war more often than not. I was delighted to find that this whole being an adult thing was so incredibly easy!
Fast forward two years. I'm 22, married to a military man, living in another country, have no idea what path I want to take career wise, and completely depressed over the state of our country and the choice I helped make in the leadership of said country. I'm desperately trying to support my husband and the troops while at the same time wanting to throw something at our president's head for increasing deployments from 12 months to 15 months. While a small part of me still felt like we needed to be in Iraq to somehow save the lives of the thousands of innocent people getting slaughtered by terrorists, I was frustrated that the government seemed so unconcerned about the amount of strain being put on military families. I could not understand how we could spend so much time policing another country when the foundation of our own country, the home, was crumbling around us. To make matters worse, I didn't have any answers on how to change things. I could voice my anger and disappointment towards the military and our country's leadership until I was blue in the face, but it's not like I had any better ideas as to how to fix things. Though Dan and I were still childless, I was deeply concerned and anxious over the type of the world my kids were going to grow up in. The amount of pain we as humans were and are in is staggering for me. It all felt so hopeless.
Once again, we fast forward another two years to today. I'm 24, my husband has been deployed for over a year, and whatever progress was being made in Iraq seems to have plateaued. There is no end to the war in sight, our country continues to spiral downward towards complete division, and the presidential title is about to change hands. For me, this election has been infuriating. It seems like every time I made a decision on who to vote for, some huge issue would come up and cause me to stop dead in my tracks and reevaluate my decision. It got to the point where I was so frustrated and sickened by all the petty slander and ridiculous arguments, I had pretty much decided not to vote at all. But that decision made many of the older adults in my life (i.e. my parents, my pastor, etc) not so happy.. and somehow I managed to be convinced that I did indeed need to vote even if it meant simply choosing the lesser of two evils. Easier said than done, but here's what ended up happening: God rocked my world.
To begin with, I shut the hell up. Do not misunderstand what I mean.. discussing politics is a part of life. Communication is vital in all areas of life. The problem is, we all spend a whole lot more time spouting off our own beliefs rather than listening to one another. For some reason, in our society, being "right" as an individual is far more important than listening to each other and coming to even the bare minimum of an understanding. Does anyone else see how backwards that is? None of us.. and I repeat NONE OF US have all the answers all the time, and we need to stop pretending like we do. It needs to be ok to be wrong. Did you hear that? IT IS OK TO BE PROVEN WRONG. The world teaches us that changing our minds about issues, whether political or otherwise, is to be weak and hypocritical. More often than not, that is so so SO not the case. Let me give you an example: I proudly bear the label "pro-life." For me, this means that I do not think abortion is right under any circumstances, and I do not agree with the death penalty. However, let's say one day Joe Schmoe comes along and presents to me a valid argument as to why I should be for the death penalty rather than against it. His facts and arguments make total sense to me, and based on that, I make an informed decision to start supporting the death penalty rather than stand against it. Friends, that does not make me a hypocrite. That makes me a mature and strong individual who is open to growth and advancement as God sees fit. Being a hypocrite means doing something IN THIS MOMENT and then turning around and telling someone else not to. Somewhere down the line, the difference between growth and hypocrisy got completely mixed up. Case and point: as a parent, you guide your children in the ways of what is right and what is wrong. You made mistakes, and you recognize that your child will also make mistakes. If you did drugs as a teenager in high school, it does not make you a hypocrite to then tell your own child that drugs are a terrible idea. Drugs are not all of a sudden ok to try because ones parents did it themselves. It's still wrong regardless. You learn from your mistakes in life, and you try and pass that wisdom on to others. If a person can stand up and say "I did this, and it was wrong and I want to encourage you not to make those same mistakes".. that shows an amazing amount of strength and wisdom. Being so involved in yourself that your entire focus is on being right is the easy part! Not only is it easy, it shows zero strength.. absolutely none. And friends, we need to encourage each other in this growth. When a person in your life is able to come around and admit they were wrong, feeling smug and gloating is not ok. Our focus needs to be shifted from this who is right and who is wrong issue to how can we support and build each other up.
I'm going to now take this one step further. Are you ready? When it comes to the right and wrong debate, the process of how the decision was reached will always be vastly more important than the end result. Let me explain what this has to do with politics.. or at least try to. I do not consider myself to be a democrat or a republican. The heart of the person running matters a whole lot more to me than some stupid title. My husband, however, is a republican. We start talking about politics, and things slowly start getting heated. By the time the argument is over, one or both of us is feeling hurt and alone in our marriage.. divided.. no longer one in Christ. Granted, we each were able to voice our individual opinions, but at what cost? Not only did the debate accomplish nothing, it also put a rift in the fabric that bonds us together. And this idea does not just apply to people who are married. It applies to ALL our relationships. Satan is brilliant at dividing and conquering, and we sit back and let it happen way more often than we should. Half the time we don't even realize it's happening. Satan sets up these huge traps in things like the presidential election. He gets us so focused on the "what" that we forget about the "who." We seem to think that as long as what it being debated is not a black or white issue.. as long as we are staying in the grey area.. that it is ok to treat each other poorly, to get angry with one another, to hurt each others feelings, to make another person feel worthless or small all in the name of having an individual opinion. Don't you see?! THIS IS NOT OKAY!
All right, one last thing. I really hope I'm making sense.. sometimes what I need to get out of my head comes faster than my hands can type and organize. This last part may make some of my fellow strong, feminist, female friends a little hot around the collar.. ha ha. People often do not see who I really am. I am a fairly private person, and for some reason, that tends to come off wrong. People are quick to assume that I am conservative in my beliefs.. that I've led a rather sheltered life.. that I follow all the rules all the time and I do not get into trouble. Most people who pass me on the street would fall over in confusion if they really knew my background and where I come from. I'm not saying this to be all emo.. I'm not looking for sympathy.. I am not saying my life has been any better or worse than anyone elses. I'm saying that I've been there.. grief, pain, and loneliness have been well practiced in my life over the years, as have grace, mercy, and love.. that when I say "I understand," I'm not just imagining what real hurt and disappointment must feel like... but that's neither here nor there. Obviously, as a Christian, my beliefs on life and love are grounded in the Bible. In the last several months, I feel like God has been moving in how we as people treat one another and deal with things. If you're super close to me, you're probably groaning right now because I keep talking about that very idea.. but I keep talking about it because God keeps revealing more and more of Himself to me in that area. As a nation, a country, a society, whatever, we have become completely divided. That whole "United We Stand" slogan is a huge joke, but I take full responsibility in allowing it get that way (as should you).. "Divided We Stand.. and are Crumbling" is a much more accurate way of putting things. For weeks, I have been anxious about this election.. mostly because I had no idea who I was a going to vote for or what it would take for me to finally make a decision. I used to think that my decision would always be easy.. that I would vote based on my own beliefs alone and disregard everyone elses opinion.. but.. are you ready for this?.. I was wrong. When Dan and I got married, we became one in Christ. How then had I allowed myself to fall into the trap of thinking that his opinions and beliefs should not cloud my own? I will tell you how: the world has set us up to believe that as a person, our little individual orbits are more important than unity as a couple or as a family. One of the biggest complaints I hear from women about Christianity is that in marriage, God calls us to be submissive to our husbands. You use the word "submit to a man" in reference to most females and you are probably going to get kicked in your junk. Ha ha. God's vision of marital unity has been vastly skewed by our own selfish ambitions. Now, do not for a even a second think that I am saying that as a wife, I should follow Dan around like a duckling asking permission for everything from spending money to when to pee. It does not mean that I blindly follow him into sin, or allow him to harm me or our future children. It means that I married a GOOD man.. a Godly man.. a man that I can trust to hear my opinions and beliefs and consider them when making all decisions. I KNOW this system has been abused and manipulated into horrible things. I'm not stupid, and I'm not blind. However, I will not allow the world to tell me that by allowing my husband to make the final call on decisions and standing 100% united with him somehow makes me a weak person. I'm entirely confused how somewhere down the line, being united as a family.. forsaking all others.. holding onto each other for dear life.. how all that became a BAD thing. To need another person, whether it be your spouse or best friend or parent or sibling, has become the ultimate form of weakness. It goes way above and beyond just foolish pride. "Charity" is practically a bad word and to serve others is somehow linked to letting people walk all over you. Do you see where I'm going with this? To truly be united as a country means to first be united in our day to day lives and relationships. We spend so much time pushing each other away.. we all have been hurt so many times and carry so much emotional baggage that opening our hearts and truly being vulnerable with one another is not something our society and this world supports.. which is exactly where Satan wants us. Divide and conquer. It has worked every time.. but not anymore.
Obama has won the election, and he states that America is poised for changed. I whole heartedly agree. But did I vote for him? It doesn't matter. God has put the people in leadership positions in our country for a reason. At the end of the day, the best we can ever hope to accomplish is to take the positive steps to change one moment, one decision, one relationship, one spoken word, one action at a time. Maybe it means simply walking away from a political debate that is starting to become heated and has the potential to hurt someone.. maybe it means that despite how many times your spouse has failed you, you are still going to choose to love him unconditionally today and have faith that God is big enough to change things.. maybe it means as a parent being able to admit being in the wrong to your child.. maybe it means leaving the past in the past and stop punishing someone for mistakes that cannot not be changed. I do not have all the answers, but neither do you.. if we did, we wouldn't be where we are today in the first place. The bottom line is that selfishness, independence, bitterness.. the idea that ones own opinion is always more important or more right than another.. keeping a record of wrong.. all that stuff is easy. Do not be fooled by the world. It takes FAR more strength to be a servant.. to be patient.. to admit when you are wrong.. to love unconditionally.. to build each other up and encourage one another.. to stand as a united front with your spouse and family and good friends against the deeds of darkness and the lies of the world.. these things, my friends, is what it means to be strong.. to be grounded in love and grace and mercy.
Oh.. and just for the record.. I definitely voted yes on giving farm animals ample exercise time. This issue definitely was my number one voting priority. :)
