For kicks and giggles.

I've been pretty open with everyone about the fact that I'm back in counseling because I think there's this stigma of shame that people feel when having to admit they are seeing a therapist. In my opinion, this shame is ridiculous. I have yet to meet a single person who at some time or another would not have benefitted from some sort of therapy.. and I've met a LOT of people. Anyway, I was filling out the paperwork for my counselor last night, and some of the questions were pretty funny.. I thought I'd share them. Basically, it asks the question "In the last 7 days, how much were you distressed by:" and then you rate everything that follows on 5 different levels (from Not At All to Extremely). Sounds easy enough. It starts out with things like "crying easily" or "feeling low energy or slowed down".. normal stuff. Then I was asked about spending, and got totally confused because I wasn't aware that "periods of intense spending" and "periods of excessive spending" were two different things. Ten questions later, I literally laughed out loud when I read: "Having urges to beat, injure, or harm someone." Besides, I think having the urge and actually following through with said beating are two different things. Ha ha.

Here's where it gets REALLY good: "Feeling that you are watched by others." Ok, I didn't feel that way until I read that. Suddenly I felt the intense urge to go peak through the blinds and make sure there wasn't some random man sitting in a car staking out my apartment. "The idea that someone else controls your thoughts." Well, I hadn't felt that way until just this very moment.. I mean, what if my lack of worry over someone else controlling my thoughts is actually because someone IS controlling my thoughts and making me feel a lack of paranoia about them. "Hearing voices that other people do not hear." Well, now that you mention it... And does it count if it's Dan's voice making me feel guilty for doing something I know he'd be disappointed in me doing? "Other people being aware of your private thoughts." I suddenly had the urge to not think ANYTHING if people around me were reading my mind. I kind of felt like Arthur in Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy when they're trying to save Trillion and have to walk through that field of shovels that smack you in the face everytime you think a thought. And of course, the second you're told NOT to think anything, you start thinking thoughts a mile a minute. "Having thoughts that are not your own." Does that really make you crazy? I'm pretty sure half the thoughts in my head were not put there by me, but rather are things I've kind of absorbed from other people. Unless they mean someone is like, implanting thoughts in my head without my permission. Now there's a creepy thought.

Disclaimer: This is all done in fun. Nobody better leave a comment about how I obviously AM crazy if I'm taking this stuff seriously. And I totally understand that these can be serious illnesses in some people.. but having been deemed "crazy" in the past, I feel I have the right to poke fun a little bit. :)