What is going on?!

I am pretty certain my stress level has reached an all time high. Ok, maybe not ALL time, but definitely enough to make me want to get off this ride I call life (and please, nobody assume that means I'm about to off myself at any minute). I finally bought my plane ticket home, and I get in the morning of the 29th. I'm so excited to see my animals, I can't even see straight.

This week consisted of phone call after phone call of not so great news. My Uncle Bluford died out of nowhere. He was one of my favorites. The last two times I was in Kentucky, I kept promising I would come over and visit with him, but things were so busy, it just never happened. Now it's too late, and it breaks my heart. My cousin, Stephanie, his daughter, is only a couple years older than I am.. I can't even imagine losing my dad at this age. I still need him too much. My brother, Max, dropped a bombshell on me out of the blue. The boy seriously needs to learn to prepare the person he's talking to before blurting out whatever is going on. I am completely at a loss as to how I'm supposed to deal with this. I'm having intense bout of deja vu, and it sort of makes me want to go hide in a hole somewhere. My best friend, Rachel, is currently in Canada visiting her fiance.. except I'm not entirely sure if she's getting married anymore. It breaks my heart, and gives me anxiety to think of her getting to stay in San Diego and me still having to move. She deserves better than the way she is being treated. And let us not even get into my inferiority complex when it comes to the role I need to play in Dan's life.

Coming to Alaska was supposed to relieve stress, not make it worse. So much for that idea. I have the distinct feeling that things are going to get much worse before they get better. Bah.